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July 6, 2020

New Two Pint Rule For Social Distancing.

The new social distancing regulations of table ordering and filling out of forms only lasted until the bottom of the second pint yesterday as pubs re-opened their doors once again.  Well we say re-opened their doors once again, if the rumours are to be believed, some establishments in Gainsborough having secret drinks behind closed curtains.

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Health

To Infinity And Colon!

A red faced man who turned up at Lincoln County Hospitals A&E department has denied allegations of sexual perversion, instead claiming he was conducting an experiment to see if a large object would fit in a small hole. Simon Blenkout from Marton, was forced to visit his local Accident & Emergency department after getting an

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News

Hooray Hooray It’s A Furlough Holiday!

A furloughed factory worker from Gainsborough who has been at home for the past six weeks due to the Coronavirus lockdown, has said that he doesn’t mind ‘one bit’, and that he hopes it goes on for many more months. David Woodson, who works at a manufacturing company making automated packaging equipment told The Sausage:”The

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