Worried men all over the world have just realised that now might be a good time to start their Christmas shopping.
For some reason unknown to mankind, men always leave their Christmas shopping to the last moment. Maybe it’s a genetic flaw or just pure incompetence. Instead of planning ahead and shopping for their gifts in advance they choose to spend all of the other Saturdays in November and December in the pub or just doing man things.
Larry Pratchett from Lincoln told The Sausage: “If I start shopping at 10:30 today that gives me enough time to catch a Macy’s breakfast, an hour and a half to buy gifts for the wife, girlfriend and me mam , then two hours to go to the pub to grab a couple of beers while ‘Slack’ Sue the barmaid wraps em up for me.”
“I don’t even know what the wife wants, she says her iron has been playing up so I may treat her to a new one as for me mam… flowers and chocolates will do and as for the girlfriend, I’ll Snapchat you the photos over…”
“I don’t know why people make a song and dance about this Xmas shopping lark, its a piece of piss if you ask me, why the wife starts in October I will never know as we only have 8 kids to buy for.”