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July 2, 2020

Bone Idle Slacking Work Colleague Only Works The Hours Specified In His Contract

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‘It’s not my job’ Seb is hated by his fellow work colleagues for not working regular extra hours.

Assistant stores worker Seb, is considered a bone idle waste of organs because he turns up at 7.30am and goes home at 4pm, like it says in the contract he signed when offered the job by management.

HR manager and general interference officer Davina Brownson told The Sausage: “That guy just takes the piss, he turns up here at the correct time, having an half hour for lunch as specified on page two of his contract and then leaving at the exact time stated in the ‘Hours of Work’ section on page three, it just takes the piss.”

“It’s almost as if he considers that his contract is to be some sort of legally-binding agreement rather than a worthless scrap of paper to be disregarded if the company wants more of your life and energy.”

“We all stay late most days, we don’t want the management thinking that we don’t pull our weight. It has been known for people to fall out because some have snook in on a Saturday morning to do more hours because their lives are governed by fear of the management, it makes the rest of us look like we are a bunch of work shy shirkers. But that Seb, he is another level! How dare he have some basic integrity.”

Seb told The Sausage: “I just go in and I do the work and then I go home. My mummy has my tea on the table by 4.15pm so I can’t be late leaving. It’s turkey dinosaur Tuesday tonight which is one of my favourites. Also when I get home I don’t even think about work, but don’t tell anyone though as I’m sure somebody would inform management.”


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