Thomas Tank or Tommy Tank to his friends has found self isolating during the coronavirus pandemic a little bit tricky and rather cringe worthy at times.
Like many, Tommy has been trying to keep himself busy for those long hours of isolation. Only for him, it’s ended up being under some of the most mortifying circumstances.
We can all sympathise with Tommy as we are all in the same boat, unless you are a key worker, but can you imagine the horror of being a 32 year old man who still lives at home with mum and dad.
The other evening Tommy was watching TV with his parents when out of the blue, there was a sex scene. While the majority of us would feel the urge to disappear to the toilet or go and get a drink from the kitchen to get away from the awkward situation, Tommy just sat there and stuck it out.
“I simply didn’t know what to do.” Tommy told The Sausage. “The scene came out of nowhere and lasted for a whole 93 seconds, I know because I counted it. I just had to sit it out. I just looked at the floor only catching a slight glimpse of my unphased parents who just sat there like nothing was happening.”
“It’s awful this lockdown, it was only the other day I found that my favourite sock had been washed by my mother, she said ‘It took some scrubbing but I got all those stains out!’
“It needs to end. I can’t even have a good old Thomas the Tank in my own room without my parents knocking on my door every few minutes asking me if ‘I want a cup of tea’, or ‘can I come play on your Xbox with you’. I’m going out of my tiny mind.”