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April 9, 2020

Coronavirus

Jesus Rejoices As Easter Is Cancelled Due To Coronavirus

Christians across the world are limiting large gatherings and physical contact to halt the transmission of Covid-19 All events to mark the important religious festival of Easter have been cancelled due to the coronavirus crisis. The traditional mass celebration of Good Friday, where some poor bugger got nailed to a cross after suffering days of

Man Quarantined With Parents Forced To Sit Watch Sex Scenes.

Thomas Tank or Tommy Tank to his friends has found self isolating during the coronavirus pandemic a little bit tricky and rather cringe worthy at times. Like many, Tommy has been trying to keep himself busy for those long hours of isolation. Only for him, it’s ended up being under some of the most mortifying

The Nations Birds All In A Flap Over Human Flu

Birds across the world are fearing the potential spread of ‘Human Flu’ and  are considering a global lock-down after scientists suggested that the human Coronavirus, Covid 19, may spread among the avian population. Big Bird, a spokesperson for birds told The Sausage earlier today: “All birds should consider reducing the amount they travel, particularly those

Hand Off Cocks And Put Away Your Favourite Sock!

It was announced today that the 2020 European Football Championship will go ahead after all, bringing light relief to footy fans across the country. This year’s European Football Championship 2020 is to be placed in the hands of teenage boys and adult males who have no girlfriends, who still live at home with Mummy and

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