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April 15, 2021


Shortage Of Fresh Fruit & Veg Supply Has No Effect Whatsoever On The People Of Scunthorpe Reveals Report

Major disruption to the supply chain of fruit and vegetables across Lincolnshire and North Lincolnshire is expected to affect the Scunthorpian diet in no negative way whatsoever, according to a report published by experts at Lincoln University. Prof David Brownmore-or-less-son told The Sausage, from a safe distance of two meters: “With the perfect storm of


The British Government has advised against all non-essential travel to S’cunthorpe A government spokesperson has confirmed that official advice about travelling to ‘The Arsehole  of Lincolnshire’ – also known as the ‘Lincolnshire’s Front Bottom’’ – has been issued. He told The Sausage: “We are now advising people against all non-essential travel to Sunny Scummy and

Locals Breathe Easy As Storm Ciara Blows Away Stink Of Scunthorpe

People in North Lincolnshire could breathe easy this weekend as the Scunthorpe stink, known affectionately as the Scunny Stench was blown away to neighbouring Yorkshire. While storm Ciara caused havoc across Britain, leaving most people unhappy with the widespread devastation of flooding, missing roofs and blocked roads, the people of North Lincolnshire filled the streets

Dry January? A Mildly Moist One If You Don’t Mind!

Dry January has been downgraded this year to mildly moist across the country it has been revealed. Millions of people, who had started the New Year with the best of intentions have already got their eager eye on what’s left of the festive seasons booze and leftover party food as their hangovers clear, thinking “Sod

That’s Not How You Spell S-cunthorpe!

Tina Turner affectionately known as Ten Bob Tina by her ‘friends’ was tuning into the ITV 1 show Good Morning Britain, Thursday, October 24, when the programme cut to Calendar to see the news in Lincolnshire and that there Yorkshire. Click Here For Ten Bob Tina However, Tina noticed an unfortunate positioning in the technical

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